Thursday, October 1, 2009

so sudden..but so much real

my dad called up to come over immediately. i went and i saw her going. leaving this world, me. i saw that every little movement that she made when she was on the ventilator. every movement and i prayed please back to normal and come to life. after seeing this for continous three days i saw the pulse rate dropping and i knew this was it. i did not want to see her i didnt. it was too early for her to die.
but this is also true tht how can i decide or who am i to decide whether it was too early?
i saw my mom dying and i could do nothing. the doctors tried. they could do nothing.
it was a clear heart failure on the 18th september 10:34.she could now rest in peace.i know she's in peace than she ever was on this earth.and maybe in a better state?

the customs of the 12th, 10th day are just to pacify the people around. the tradition of asthi visarjan just made me realise what we are. after we die. we are just those pieces of bones left. where's that life?
where does it come from. and where does it go?

i do not know and never will.

1 comment:

  1. the body is that gets destroyed but what really is life.. and how does it go on...meta physicists differentiate between life of matter and energy.. the matter passes away and the energy lives on in us in all who loved and were loved.. life goes on :) may her soul rest in peace